12-11-12

     Well, here I sit, with an ice block on my ass trying to dull the pain of this damn IT band. Want a quick way to drop some weight? Chop off this freaking leg for all the pain it's giving me. Seriously, how can I train for a 5k run if I can't run? It's pretty frustrating to me. Honestly, come on body, give me a break here. I have done more for you this past month and a little bit then I have since I got out of high school. I am paying more attention to what I am putting in my face and I am trying to stay way away from the stuff I know isn't good for me. How have you rewarded me so far body? You have a literal pain in the ass, and you have stopped losing weight.

     The IT band issue, from everything I am reading on the net is mostly caused by a few things. First, my gate while running is probably to long causing an over stretching of the band over the entire time I am on the treadmill. Second, my hip flexors are probably a little on the weak side, and third, my hips are probably on the tight side. Okay, so I have identified the problems or at least the potential problems so it's a matter of fixing them. One article that I read said that using a 6 week strengthening program working on the hip muscles got rid of the pain and people were able to run again pain free. Sounds okay. 6 weeks from today. God damn it! During that 6 weeks I should be able to increase any flexibility issues that I have in my hips, so for that keep going with the yoga and do some special IT band stretches. As for the gate issue..  Damn it..  I have to wait, and wait, and wait, until I can run a bit on that damn treadmill so that I can record it from a couple of different angles and forward it on to an internet friend of the wife's who happens to be a PT. Damn it. Working so hard and for what. To wait. Seriously.

     As far as the wight loss goes. This morning, I weighed myself. I only post weight updates here once a week but I hop on the scale about every other day. It may be too much, it may be obsessive but damn it, I want to KNOW that I am going the right way. Well, this morning I got a slap in the face. I didn't lose anything since last week, in fact I had gained a pound. What the hell! (note to the wife, no, my body isn't in starvation mode) Back on the internet I went and what I found out was that my body is screwing with me and it's perfectly normal. This is something I knew could happen way in the back of my mind. I remember this from the hours of being in a gym. My body has gotten to the point where it now knows what I am doing and it is slowing everything down because it's not sure when it's going to get fuel again. This isn't starvation mode, not yet. This is normal when you get all fat and try and do something about it. From what I was reading today, this could have been the beginning of the dreaded "rubber band." Here is the cool thing, if you know what's happening then you know not to let it worry you as long as you don't gain back an excessive about of weight. One to two pounds if fairly normal and all you need to do to correct it is to mix up your routine a bit. In severe cases you may need to eat more often, the 5 or 6 times a day that you might have heard of in small quantities. I don't think I am to that point yet but if I change up my exercise routine a bit it should be enough to shock my body back into fat burning.

     What else should I toss in here today? Nothing. I think that's all I have in my brain tonight. 

     Motivation time..  Tonight I have very little. I got on the elliptical tonight for 25 minutes. I have an ice pack on my ass. I am sore and if I move just right I feel like I can collapse. Not much in the way of motivation tonight. Am I going to stop though? Nope. The old me is still in control. The me that sets a goal and will do just about anything to get there.

-C 

about a week in but the blog starts now

     Well, here it is.  I am fat. I am out of shape. I am not leading my children by example.  In short, I have become unhappy. I didn't feel like my wife and I were doing much of anything together, except looking at computer screens while in the same room without talking to each other. I didn't feel like I was able to properly participate in my children's activities this past summer because I didn't feel like I could "keep up." These things really started getting to me bad. When I would rather go for a bike ride or stay home because of the way I was feeling, it just made me more depressed.  I was getting upset with myself but didn't WANT to make the change. It wasn't until a few weeks ago that I started giving my marriage some thought. I am not the same person my wife married. How could she still be attracted to me. How could she want to be with me? Why wouldn't she want to find someone that will do all the outdoor activities that she is finding, and liking. As I said, depressed. It's the way my brain goes.
     The kicker here?  I was doing it all to myself. I know I was. The more she went and did with the kids, the more I was unhappy. My biggest fear, I have come to the conclusion of as of the last 5 months or so is exclusion. I don't like it at all and will act way out of my normal calm self if I start to feel that way. However, by not being able to or not wanting to do anything with my family this summer I was excluding myself. Downward spiral much?  So, about a week ago or so I decided, once and for all, I am going to change my body. I may never be the athlete I was in high school again, but I don't know if my family would want that. I may not have the metabolism I had in high school. I may not recover as fast as I once did but I am going to do it.
So, that's my back story, it's the why I have to do this anyways. It's the motivation that I will need to fall back on once and a while. My children, my wife, myself, my family. Obviously I am going to need to fall back on them from time to time. I will need that push. I promise that I will. All I am, and all that I have is love my my family for whom I would do anything for. In this case, the anything is to buckle down and get off my ass.
     So, I guess I need to put it out there. As of last week I weighed 240lbs. I started to diet. I want to get down to at least 200lbs. My body type is such (because of a lot of hours in the gym) that I don't think I would look very good much under 200lbs. However, I plan on getting to 200lbs and then seeing how I look and feel. My plan is to use my fitness pal  to keep track of things as I progress. My user name is chrislague if you care to have a friend on there. Anyways, I have lost 3 lbs so far by just changing what I was eating and, I think, more importantly keeping track of what I am eating. As of today, I have started running on my treadmill.  For that I am using an app for my Windows phone called C25K.  C25K, or couch to 5K is a running trainer designed to get somebody off the couch and running a 5K in 9 weeks at 3 times per week. 27 runs on the treadmill?  Sounds good.
After tonight I think I may have to make it a 10 week. I was weak and couldn't make every run cycle for the full time.  It is kind of a cool app though even if it is mostly just a time that will once and a while tell you to when to walk, run, or cool down.
     So, C25K is one tool in the effort to get back into shape. As I said, it is 3 days a week. The other thing that I am going to do is 3 days of yoga.  At one point the wife was doing yoga almost daily and she not only seemed to really like it but it was almost addictive for her. I used to be very flexible and I hope that yoga will get me a limber again. I also think that it may help me to run a bit better. I may not be an athlete anymore but my legs are the size of a football players. The problem with that is that when I do certain types of exercise the blood pours into my calves and they cramp up. Bad. It started to happen tonight and I wanted so much to stop running to give them a break. This is where I can depend on my wife. She was right down there with me riding a stationary bike looking right at me. If I would have stopped she would have had permission to get me going someway. I will and do need her to help me though this. At least for the first couple of weeks. They are going to be tough, I can feel it already. 30 minutes on the treadmill and my legs are throbbing.
I think that I have written enough for a first blog.  I can't tell you how often I'll write here.  I am going to try to be more focused on my goal then on a blog but I will check back from time to time and update my progress.
     If you have read all this, thanks! I'll even ask you to think of me on my journey and wish me well. I know I am going to need it!

-C